Monday, February 14, 2011

Savoring


Silence. It won't last long.
Learning new things.
Discovering I LOVE playing the mandolin.
Time alone in the city.
Coffee. Alone in the city.
Lunch. Alone in the city.
Seattle.
New boots.
Finding contentment in my little house, with my little life.
I have everything I need.
A husband who fills up my love tank everyday so much that I really don't care what he does for me for Valentine's Day.

This song. I'm learning how to play it, and I'm like, totally proud of myself. I don't sound half bad. If you haven't seen this movie, you must put it in your Netflix queue immediately. SO powerful. A parent's nightmare, but as the wanderer...I really, really, get it.




What's feeding your soul these days?

Friday, February 4, 2011

In the moment



rolling pins
floured hands.
cookie dough. (eaten, that is)
valentine hearts.
blankets. snuggled under.
her feet on mine, dancing.
giggles.
twirls.
whispered secrets in my ear, of plans for a birthday party still 4 months off.
I can't tell you, but I can tell you it involves meatballs and butterflies.
fireplace alight.
stories told
hearts kindled.

I am savoring this moment, for I know how soon it will pass.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Emergent Growth


Spring is already in the air here in the Northwest, with the first tentative buds bulging on trees, and the tiniest shoots of green popping up in the garden. It's a tease of course, as Spring is every year here, it starts early, but fruition is a long time coming. We joke that summer starts July 5th in the Northwest, and seriously, it ain't no joke.

There are seed catalogs beginning to pile up on my counter, so far un-browsed, but beckoning. I look out at my raggedy garden, soaked, muddy, and most definitely dormant. The greenhouse plastic in tatters, my chicken coop long abandoned. I've long dreamed of turning our little 2 acres in the woods into a little self-sustaining farmette, a spiritual and creative retreat, if only with a tiny yurt or wall tent on our back lot for a sanctuary/yoga/writing/art/reading/prayer-hut. I could totally, totally make this happen.

So, why don't I? I mean besides the fact that I have 4 children, ages 4, 7, 9 and 11, and that motherhood and homemaking utterly and completely kicks my ass at times? Yes, I'm busy, just like everyone else is, and really who wants to hear that excuse from anyone? Yet, I excuse myself from my own dreams because of busy-ness all the time.

Today I was flipping through the latest copy of MaryJanesFarm magazine (You MUST check her out if you don't know her already) for some inspiration, and of course, I found it. But this quote completely knocked me out:

"Too often we balk at the very things that could give us the life we want. Too often, the fear that we're incapable causes us to make excuses.

'No time'

'No money'

'No clue how to use a circular saw.' [insert your own favorite tool or art supply here]

The obstacles seem great, the provisions slim. We talk about "making do." But that doesn't mean settling-it means expecting more and better from yourself."-MaryJane Butters.

YES! Amen, Amen, Amen! This life I dream of is unimaginably, tantalizingly, amazingly, and gratefully within arms reach. I am so thankful to be able to stay home with my children, to have all my needs taken care of, and to even have a little left over for fun and dream building. To have a husband who tolerates and even encourages all my dreams, and gives me an understanding grin with his eye roll when I tell him my latest plans, and always tells me to go for it. There's nothing standing in my way, except myself, my own fears of failure, (and of success) and yes, I'm afraid a wee bit of laziness too. Making that life happen will take a lot of good old fashioned hard work.

I really just need to put pen to paper, seed to soil, chick to coop, arse to cushion, heart to prayer and be ready to ask for lots and lots of help along the way to learn the things I don't know how to do already. But I CAN do it.

"You have everything you need to begin."

This was my chosen mantra when I took the Mondo Beyondo class last year. (highly recommended, by the way). This statement has been rattling around in my brain again lately. Perhaps it's seeing the light lingering in the sky a few minutes longer each evening, the aroma of Spring surprising me as I step out into the cold, damp air, but I'm feeling ready to grow again. I've been in a season of rest for several months, recovering from what I realized was several years of debilitating stress and health issues, rearranging my thought patterns, letting go of guilt and crazy expectations, accepting more and more of myself as I really am. I am so grateful that I live in a peaceful country, in a wonderful small town, with an amazing husband, and 4 really great kids. My life is full. I can take it any which way I choose. I really do have EVERYTHING I need to begin. I bet you do too.

I know what I want to do with it all. But, it's easy to get pulled away, lulled by screens, watching other people have all the adventures, or get lost in the fun of learning about it all, and forgetting to actually DO something.

Create, Engage, Connect, Grow.

That I can do.

What are you doing these days? What new ideas are incubating for you right now?

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

New and Improved...

Hello again Found Art Fans, welcome to my new (actually old) blog. I'm laying the lovely Found Art Project to rest, and returning to my original "L'il Bit Crunchy" format. After a long season of resting, restoring, hibernating, and incubating, I'm ready to get personal again. I've combined my old L'il Bit Crunchy blog and The Found Art Project into this new space, with my name out there loud and proud in the new url. If you have me bookmarked, please note the change in the web address above.

I'll be sharing personal photos, essays, good links, and general ramblings about living a creative, spirit- filled, forward-thinking, socially-engaged, home-centered, soul-nurturing, earth-saving life. You know, in a totally non-militant, not having to do it all, fly by the seat of your pants kind of way. And yes, all with little ones afoot. It's all good.

I hope you'll stay with me, and I thank each of you for being part of The Found Art Project, whether you sent me a submission or as a regular reader! I think you'll find we can still be good friends.

Join me as I get a wee bit more personal!

Stay tuned...

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Ah, home again..

Haven't posted on this blog for a long time, but feeling the pull to get small, more connected with what's right in front of me. Just wanted to post a link to a very lovely new to me website, Rhythm of the Home I'm loving it!! Just what I'm needing right now. They're hosting a great giveaway right now on their blog. The new Winter edition of Rhythm of the Home is up right now! Check it out. I think you'll like it too.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Chasing Dreams


How To Be a Poet

BY WENDELL BERRY
(to remind myself)
i

Make a place to sit down.
Sit down. Be quiet.
You must depend upon
affection, reading, knowledge,
skill—more of each
than you have—inspiration,
work, growing older, patience,
for patience joins time
to eternity. Any readers
who like your poems,
doubt their judgment.

ii

Breathe with unconditional breath
the unconditioned air.
Shun electric wire.
Communicate slowly. Live
a three-dimensioned life;
stay away from screens.
Stay away from anything
that obscures the place it is in.
There are no unsacred places;
there are only sacred places
and desecrated places.

iii

Accept what comes from silence.
Make the best you can of it.
Of the little words that come
out of the silence, like prayers
prayed back to the one who prays,
make a poem that does not disturb
the silence from which it came.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Practice This


"A spirituality that is only private and self-absorbed, one devoid of an authentic political and social consciousness, does little to halt the suicidal juggernaut of history. On the other hand, an activism that is not purified by profound spiritual and psychological self-awareness and rooted in divine truth, wisdom, and compassion will only perpetuate the problem it is trying to solve, however righteous its intentions. When, however, the deepest and most grounded spiritual vision is married to a practical and pragmatic drive to transform all existing political, economic, and social institutions, a holy force - the power of wisdom and love in action - is born. This force I define as Sacred Activism."

- Andrew Harvey

And to that, I say a hearty Amen. I am so moved these days to get busy and DO something about the lack of deep spiritual teaching in our culture, the lack of real love between neighbors and people groups, the quick judgments, the apathy, the consumerism. And I know that all of those problems I see "out there" are actually lodged deeply in my own heart as well. And only when I see it, name it, and begin to move toward a more integrated way of living, when I can truly say I'm living out what I most deeply believe in, THAT'S when change can really happen.

I came across this list of Practice Ideas in a handout I received at the Awakening the Dreamer Symposium that I went to a few weeks ago. If you have a chance to go to this life changing presentation, GO.

Or, start here:

Daily Practices for Staying Awake:

  • Designate a regular daily practice such as meditation, prayer or yoga
  • Investigate and watch for examples of interconnectedness everywhere
  • Consider and pay attention to dreams, daydreams and visions as possible messages from other dimensions of reality
  • Let the wisdom of the Earth speak through you
  • Change your conversations to be of possibility and inspiration to others
  • Be compassionate and forgiving with yourself
  • As a radical act: want less, buy less, use less
  • Consciously read, listen, watch and engage with things that inspire you to Change the Dream [the current "dream"/nightmare the world finds itself in today]
  • Breathe deeply
  • Read one page of something that inspires you
  • Attend a religious or spiritual group that is new to you
  • Play with crayons
  • Stretch your body
  • Write down your dreams
  • Take a nap
  • Listen to someone older than you
  • Hug a tree
  • Write down 3 things you are grateful for
  • Do nothing for one minute
  • Build a fort with blankets
  • Remember to play
  • Don't answer the phone [or check your email]
  • Write an answer to the question, "What is the purpose of my life?"
  • Watch or read something that inspires you everyday
  • Create spaces for authentic rituals in your life such as giving thanks for a new day
  • Don't read your mail [or watch the news] for one day
  • Smile at yourself in the mirror
  • Take care about what you put in your mind and heart
  • Turn off your TV
  • Dream with friends
  • Smile as your walk down the street
Who's in?